It sure feels like as much as I love my kids, I’m really not supposed to be a mom.
What a terrible thing to say right? I agree. I feel my eyes moistening after writing that, but unfortunately it really seems to be true.
Figuring out how to make adequate money while being a SAHM (Stay At Home Mom) building online communities has not worked out.
It feels like it is time for me to look instead into childcare options, and to look for a day job.
It is like either my family needs (food/housing/clothing/gas) are going to be met and I’ll be gone working, or we’ll end up homeless and hungry, but I’ll be with them.
Not that I’m a good stay at home mom anyway, cleaning is definitely not my fortay, looking around the house proves this, papers piled up on the table, clothes piled up in the closet, and plates are stacking up on the table/sink/counters as well.
When I stop watching the kids to clean…bigger messes are made. When I am with the kids and spending time playing/being with them…same thing.
My efforts feel wasted except for the loving relationships we have…but that doesn’t pay rent, or put gas in the car.
Seems like I have to go take a job doing tech support so that I can pay rent and let KinderCare raise my kids.